Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's not a foreskin expert like you
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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