How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
