I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
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