I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
