Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
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