Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (562): hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available http://tfl.nu/v31e
  Replies (5) Good night (1222) Bad night (619)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.

  (415): View more from California

  What...you let him do that?

  (650): View more from California

  It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow. (415): What...you let him do that? (650): It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow http://tfl.nu/aum0
  Replies (72) Good night (5589) Bad night (831)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner. http://tfl.nu/5d6x
  Replies (42) Good night (1111) Bad night (14992)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever. http://tfl.nu/o6xg
  Replies (31) Good night (755) Bad night (5397)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants http://tfl.nu/j8mk
  Replies (8) Good night (1081) Bad night (5347)
• Favorite

  (862): View more from New Jersey

  he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (862): he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!" http://tfl.nu/rt63
  Replies (15) Good night (5323) Bad night (1587)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right? http://tfl.nu/h1i3
  Replies (7) Good night (4303) Bad night (1308)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs" http://tfl.nu/8pn3
  Replies (14) Good night (6690) Bad night (1541)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class? http://tfl.nu/2kq9
  Replies (10) Good night (975) Bad night (3157)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus." http://tfl.nu/ftkz
  Replies (4) Good night (2305) Bad night (790)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila. http://tfl.nu/zwy5
  Replies (5) Good night (1182) Bad night (629)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious. http://tfl.nu/0zzq
  Replies (8) Good night (896) Bad night (505)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis. http://tfl.nu/4osl
  Replies (4) Good night (855) Bad night (362)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station. http://tfl.nu/zvhj
  Replies (0) Good night (670) Bad night (473)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (563): Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass. http://tfl.nu/dcdi
  Replies (1) Good night (844) Bad night (292)

Randomize