does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize