what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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