Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize