Texts From Last Night

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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?

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  (250): Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep? http://tfl.nu/pboz
  Replies (41) Good night (920) Bad night (3368)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  bitch so ugly she owes me an erection

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  (919): bitch so ugly she owes me an erection http://tfl.nu/ldn1
  Replies (29) Good night (806) Bad night (4707)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.

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  (647): TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW. http://tfl.nu/946s
  Replies (13) Good night (6144) Bad night (948)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.

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  (541): he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married. http://tfl.nu/sari
  Replies (27) Good night (817) Bad night (5335)
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  (862): View more from New Jersey

  he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"

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  (862): he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!" http://tfl.nu/rt63
  Replies (15) Good night (5202) Bad night (1465)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us

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  (713): the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us http://tfl.nu/zpdd
  Replies (14) Good night (6878) Bad night (895)
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  (714): View more from California

  It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.

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  (714): It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs. http://tfl.nu/jalq
  Replies (11) Good night (450) Bad night (1900)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too

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  (407): I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too http://tfl.nu/awue
  Replies (0) Good night (930) Bad night (476)
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  (510): View more from California

  I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.

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  (510): I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter. http://tfl.nu/hgbg
  Replies (13) Good night (649) Bad night (1753)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.

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  (570): Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me. http://tfl.nu/6mb8
  Replies (8) Good night (732) Bad night (793)
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  (631): View more from New York

  Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.

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  (631): Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life. http://tfl.nu/mm7p
  Replies (10) Good night (305) Bad night (963)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill

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  (507): Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill http://tfl.nu/0ptc
  Replies (4) Good night (364) Bad night (1165)
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  (44): View more from United Kingdom

  Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?

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  (44): Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops? http://tfl.nu/g9tn
  Replies (4) Good night (768) Bad night (215)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.

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  (309): I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne. http://tfl.nu/l6oj
  Replies (2) Good night (333) Bad night (279)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex

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  (508): This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex http://tfl.nu/5anx
  Replies (2) Good night (597) Bad night (282)

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