please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
