That's when you crack a 10am beer
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
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