Taylor Swift is so right about you.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
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I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
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Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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