When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Randomize