I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
