AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
