Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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