I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
