He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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