Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
