On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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