He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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