Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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