You made me cry and you don't even care
The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
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