y did u give ur computer a hand job?
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one