is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
