Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Randomize
