Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
it's great music for shaving your balls
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
