after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
