I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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