Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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