# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize