he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
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