I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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