The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Just puked most of my soul out..
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
