I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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