You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
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