the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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