Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
