Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Randomize
