She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Randomize
