HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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