I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
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