STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Randomize
