I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
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