and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
i dont even know how to be here
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
