Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize