so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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