i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
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