we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
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